I have been given a lot of hell recently for my “gentle
ribbing” of male libertarian skeptics through the creation of my Facebook Page Skepdudes – A Celebration of Hot Male
Skeptics Who Are NOT Libertarian. That's fine, I can take it. However, I thought that they would enjoy a gentle ribbing. In fact, I have heard that some enjoy a less than gentle ribbing on a regular basis!
So, Heidi, you may ask, why all the hate? In the immortal words of Rodney King “Can’t we all just get along?” After all, Libertarians “basically believe in individual choice and responsibility. You make your choices and you are responsible for the consequences of those choices.” (M. Shermer 2009)
So why shouldn’t all horny skeptic women immediately mount these Randy creatures?
Top Ten Reasons Not to Fuck A Libertarian
- Apparently, despite their names, the Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged are NOT porn. At least to normal people
- Laissez-faire is never a good thing in bed.
- Rational self-interest is code for him coming in five minutes and going back to work.
- Ethical egoism is often synonymous with egotistical asshat who gives to charity. Of course that "charity" is a libertarian PAC.
- Travel to late night booty calls requires roads. Roads that he wishes were privatized, perhaps by Halliburton or Blackwater
- Showers to get ready for sex or clean up afterwards require water, which many of us would prefer to be free from deadly amoebas. Women are so picky.
- Sex toys made in a libertarian society could contain nasty, nasty things that would anger your vagina. Of course, the MARKET, would eventually correct it, but do you want to be the sacrificial tang? Additionally, with no government testing or regulations of condoms, who knows what could happen. Don’t worry about it. Again, market correction will help, because if the condom breaks now, you will be SURE not to buy that condom brand again.
- If you get pregnant, sure abortion will be available. In fact, LOTS of choices for abortion would be available, including the market driven cheapie drive-thru abortion clinics (Stop N Drop That Fetus) that the government has no power to shut down.
- If you choose to give birth, there is a high chance that the child will ALSO have the libertarian gene. Can you really risk that? Do you want to homeschool? Do you want to go back to work three days after giving birth because there is no maternity leave and your employer can fire you with no repercussions?
- Finally, with so many yummy liberal skeptic dudes, who has time to fuck the free market fundies?
Roko Mijic, liberal skeptic and my next husband. Nuff said.
